weareallsosmall

i never planned on staying on long island. its been almost three months since ross and i have returned here and i have mixed feelings of the place. most people can and will say this about their home towns or cities, but long island is a black hole that few can escape. its secluded from the rest of the country, there are truly borders. its a place of mass consumption, of trash, and of unnecessary expenses. a land of people who are not accepting of change, rude, irresponsible, and self absorbed .

i wonder how things got this way, and if they will ever change. right now, at this point in my life, i just cant see myself living here. i need more freedom than this place can offer me. freedom from a life where i need to work my week away to survive, where i dont have time to myself and time to spend doing the things i enjoy, free of the necessity of a vehicle, free of the cruelty i see which makes my heart sad and feel helpless, free of the trash and filth which we are all poisoning ourselves with, and free of the mentality that because im a twenty something year old without a career im some sort of bum failure. there is some sort of privilege that i think people feel when they live here, consciously or not. even i feel guilty of criticizing long island, like there is a voice in my head saying, this is such a great place, you should feel lucky to be here, the beaches, the city, the education, blah blah blah, you ungrateful brat. its what we have all been told our whole lives, and while it makes some feel superior, it just makes me feel like i dont belong.

it hurts me more than anything to see people who are unhappy, or even miserable in their lives, and not doing anything to change. you can only go up, if you are at the bottom.

there are other places out there, other people, other mentalities, and other ways of life. they do exist, and i just cant comprehend how so many of us dont even have any drive to get out there and explore.

on to better things, or worse, ive been sick with a cold/sinus infection type thing on and off for over two weeks now. quite annoying. i made up a soup today which i have made a few times before. it was delicious and cleared my head up a bit!

curry chicken rice soup, a vague recipe

chicken broth(32oz)

curry powder(2 tbs.)

coconut milk(half a can, i think about 6 oz)

carrots(3)

celery(3 stalks)

onions(half a decent sized onion)

chicken breast, sliced or shredded(1)

rice, any kind but i use wild rice(as much as you prefer)

red pepper, salt, pepper(as needed/prefered)

chop up veg, place in a pot with some oil and curry powder and a bit of the broth, cook for about 5 minutes, add the rest of the broth, half a can of coconut milk, salt, peppers, and chicken, cook for about half an hour but i think it tastes better the longer you let it cook! while its cooking make rice in another pot and add to finished soup!

yay!

easy!

yum!